Safer sex

SAFER FUCKING/BEING FUCKED

This page is an attempt to bring together safer sex information for all types of transmen; whether they have a mancunt (vagina), a meta or a phallus.
Updates and new input always welcome!

Good sex should be fun.

Sex can involve cocks, your front hole, arsehole, mouth or hands. Some guys are tops (doing the fucking), bottoms (being fucked) or a mixture of both (versa/versatile).
Front hole and anal sex may be new to some guys. This can take practice. It does not need to be rushed, forced or painful. Also, some guys are just not into penetration.
Sex can be fun, validating, romantic, anonymous, quick and dirty, hot and heavy. However you have it, it’s possible to have good sexual health too.
Bodily fluids can contain HIV and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs). This means cum and pre-cum, blood, front hole fluids, and rectal fluids (from inside the arse) can all transmit HIV and STI’s. Some types of sex have a higher risk for STIs including HIV. This includes getting fucked in the arse or front hole (or fucking someone else).

“Oil-based lubes can
cause latex condoms to
split and tear. Stick to
water-based lubricant if
you’re using condoms”

Any STI in the throat or mouth can be transmitted to the genitals through saliva. Saliva also contains bacteria that might lead to vaginal infections.

Tips on safer fucking:
✧ Condoms. On your cock, on your dildo, on their cock. Whether it has always been there, you’ve had some surgical assistance or if your cock is in a harness. If it’s being used for penetration, keeping it covered can prevent HIV and bacterial infections.
✧ Change your condoms (and gloves) between each hole, and each partner to prevent the spread of both bacteria and infections. Ask your partner(s) to do the same.
✧ Wetter is better: Using lots of lube can feel great. Our own front hole lubrication can be reduced if we’re taking T. So we might need more lube than we did before we started hormones.
✧ The arse doesn’t self-lubricate, so plenty of lube and being relaxed and turned on can help you enjoy being fucked. Lube also reduces the chance of tissue damage that can help infections occur.
✧ Use plenty of water-based lube if you’re using latex condoms. Oil-based lube (like Vaseline) can be fun but not with condoms. This is because oil can cause condoms and gloves to break.
A premium tip for everyone is: use latex-free condoms more often. These are stronger, feel better and are safer for everyone. They are more expensive but can withstand all types of lubricant – and you may be allergic to latex without knowing it.
✧ Remember, there’s a difference between lubes meant just for anal, compared to those designed for front hole use. Anal lube can sting if used on more sensitive body parts.
✧ Gloves: If you’re putting hands or fists into a body part, it’s best to protect them. Keep a selection of latex and non-latex gloves around for when you’re having hands on fun.
✧ PrEP. PrEP is a daily pill that can protect against HIV. See p30 for more info.
✧ PEP. If you didn’t use a condom or if it broke or came off, PEP can prevent HIV

PEP is a month of HIV treatment that needs to be started as soon as possible after the risk

CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

Oral sex
Giving or getting a blowjob, or licking or having your front hole licked is not a risk for HIV but can be a risk for STIs. Giving someone else oral sex has a lower risk for HIV transmission than fucking, but can be a risk for STIs.
Luckily most STIs are easy to treat and so good sexual health involves having regular health checks. Although
condoms and dental dams can help prevent infections, they are not widely used or popular for oral sex.
Tips for safer oral sex:
✧ Avoid brushing your teeth, flossing or using mouthwash for at least 30mins either side of oral sex. Otherwise, this can cause your gums to bleed and be an easier route for infection.
✧ Avoid oral sex if you’ve got a sore throat or cough. Oral is a no-no if you have mouth ulcers. Or if you recently had dental work.

Rimming
Licking, tonguing or eating arse is not a risk for HIV, but can be a risk of other infections, including hep A.
The arse and the arsehole can be super sensitive. Some of us love being touched there and your partner(s) might too!
Washing first reduces the chance of infections, especially if you don’t use a dental dam.
CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

Anal sex and douching
Washing prior to sex can be a choice, some guys like the smell of the unwashed male body. For some, anal douching (washing inside your arse) before sex can help us feel clean and more confident. Lots of people swear by it. Others see a small risk of contact with faeces as a normal part of anal sex. So douching is a choice.
Normally, unless we need to go to the toilet, our arse is empty and clean. You can get a pretty good idea by testing with your finger. If you want to douche, first go to the toilet to shit. Then use warm water, gently, from a bulb douche, shower hose or water bottle. Hold the water in for a few minutes and then release it. Repeat a few times until the water is clear. This needs a little preparation but is worth trying if you worry about being clean. Practice until you understand how this part of your body works.
However, douching, even just with water, can irritate the lining of your arse. This can make it more vulnerable to infections. Don’t use soaps or antiseptic inside, as these can irritate the lining.

 

CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

 

HEP C
Hepatitis C is a virus that causes liver disease that without treatment can be fatal. In the early stages of infection, people rarely notice any symptoms.
Although new hep C drugs are very effective, they are sometimes difficult to access.
Hep C infection usually comes from blood to blood contact. This can happen by sharing drug injecting equipment (syringes, spoons, water etc.). It can also be sexually transmitted, especially if either partner is HIV positive.
Some of us are into kink and BDSM (which can stand for a combination of bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism and masochism). Many BDSM activities don’t involve bodily fluids or our genitals at all.
However, some of us are into BDSM play that involves blood, cutting and piercing. It is important to use clean and sterile equipment for all these activities to avoid spreading infections like hep C and HIV. If you are worried about hep C, it is easy to test at your local sexual health
clinic. It can take 3-6 months for hep C to show up in a blood test and up to 12 months if you are HIV positive.

More info on the Dutch site https://nomorec.nl/

TasP stands for
Treatment as Prevention.
TasP describes the impact
of HIV treatment (ART) on
reducing the risk of HIV
transmission. People on
effective ART (for at least
6 months) usually have so
little virus that they are
no longer infectious. This
depends on having an
undetectable viral load.
Some people put
‘undetectable’ on their
social media profiles. This
means they are living with
HIV and are on effective
ART, Undetectable =
Untransmittable17

HIV
HIV stands for Human Immunodeficiency Virus. HIV is a virus that weakens the immune system. It
exists in some bodily fluids of people who are living with HIV. These are:
✧blood.
cum.
pre-cum.
vaginal (or front hole) fluid.

✧ anal mucus (the slimy lining we
have inside our arse).
✧ breast milk (though this risk is only
to a baby)15.

HIV is NOT in sweat, piss or spit.
You cannot get HIV kissing, sharing food, human bites or simply living in the same house as someone
with HIV. Cum or other sexual fluids being splashed onto healthy skin (free of cuts or ulcers) is not a
risk for HIV either.
If left untreated, HIV can cause damage to the immune system. This increases the risk
for other infections, some of which can be fatal. However, HIV treatment (called ART)
is very effective. It means most people living with HIV in the UK can lead long, healthy
and happy lives.
Regular testing is important to be able to access treatment and protect your partners.
People of any age, gender or sexuality can be HIV positive.
If someone doesn’t know they have HIV, they will not be on ART. This means there is a risk of sexual
transmission unless condoms or PrEP is being used16.
CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

 

PrEP TO REDUCE RISK OF HIV
PrEP19
PRE = Before
EXPOSURE = a risk for HIV infection
(sex without condoms/condom breakage)
PROPHYLAXIS = treatment to prevent infection
PrEP is a way of preventing HIV infection by taking a pill. This is either daily, or
based around your sexual activity and risk. PrEP is taken by people who don’t
have HIV to stay HIV negative.
PrEP is very effective, but only when people take the tablets as directed.
PrEP is currently only available from the NHS in England or Wales as part of a
study. However, PrEP is available in Scotland (www.prep.scot).
The PrEP Impact Trial is available from some clinics in England. You can find
out more from the website and find a participating clinic near you (www.
prepimpacttrial.org.uk).
Many people also buy PrEP online.

 

Trans guys taking
testosterone (T).
T might reduce our
natural lubrication and
thin the tissue inside
the front hole. We don’t
know if this is likely to
make PrEP less effective,
or change how long it
takes for PrEP to reach
protective levels. Daily
PrEP is therefore the
best option.

Talk to your sexual health team about PrEP. Let them know the kinds of sex
you have.
✧ PrEP can be taken daily or just when you need it, but options depends
on the type of sex you’re having.
✧ Anal sex has different dosing options, including being used just before
and after sex.
✧ Front hole protection needs daily dosing for at least six days a week.
PrEP needs to be taken for a week before it reaches the best levels for
protection.
For more info on PrEP check out: iwantprepnow.co.uk21 and PrEPster.info22.
i-Base also produce a helpful guide http://www.i-Base.info/PrEP20

CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

 

 

PEP TO REDUCE RISK OF HIV
PEP18
POST = After
EXPOSURE = a risk for HIV infection
(sex without condoms/condom breakage)
PROPHYLAXIS = treatment to prevent infection
PEP can stop you becoming HIV positive if you have been at risk. For
example, if you had sex without a condom or the condom broke

PEP is a 28-day course of HIV meds.
PEP is FREE at NHS sexual health clinics and A&Es.
PEP needs to be started asap and within three days of the risk.
It is most effective if taken ASAP.
There are very few interactions with testosterone treatment.

If you’ve fucked or been fucked without a condom, or the condom broke,
PEP can prevent HIV. Try to talk to a healthcare worker about PEP as soon as
possible. Let them know if you’re taking testosterone and about any other
drugs or medications.

CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

 

SEXUAL HEALTH CHECKS: GETTING TESTED
All guys who have sex with guys should test for HIV and other STIs at least once a
year. Testing when you change sexual partners is a good idea too.
It takes about 3-4 weeks after a potential risk for HIV to show on a 4th generation test.
This takes a little longer (8 to 12 weeks) using a 3rd generation HIV test.
There’s lots of ways to get tested:
✧ At NHS sexual health services or your GP.
✧ At a community organisation.
✧ Using postal/home sampling or testing.
Most finger-prick rapid tests, home tests and home sampling use 3rd generation tests.
Most tests taking a blood sample at a sexual health clinic (not just a fingerprick) are
4th generation.

A negative result means you were HIV negative several weeks before the test.
If the result is positive, this needs to be confirmed with a second blood test24.
Having a full sexual health check is the only way to know about most infections. This
includes hep B and C, syphilis, chlamydia and gonorrhoea as well as HIV. A full check
involves blood tests and swabs/urine samples.

Testing HIV positive
If you test HIV positive, your nurse or health advisor will talk to you about
what happens next24.
Usually this will include:

✧ Seeing a specialist HIV doctor. This should include the option to start
HIV treatment called Anti-Retroviral Therapy (or ART for short).
✧ Discussion about emotional support.
Testing positive can be a big shock. Even though HIV treatment is now
effective and easy to take, learning you are positive can be difficult.
Regularly HIV tests and starting early ART means guys who are HIV positive
can expect to live a normal lifespan. Knowing your HIV status puts you in
control of your health and wellbeing.

For advice or information visit https://www.ggd.amsterdam.nl/infectieziekten/soa-hiv-sense/

 

HORMONES & PREGNANCY
Hormones usually come in an injection or gel. Testosterone (or “T”) has
masculinising effects and may increase facial and body hair. It can also
reduce fat on your chest and hips and the hair on your scalp. T can increase
your appetite, muscle mass, sex drive. It can cause your cock to grow larger
and become more sensitive 25.
Not all trans guys will want to take T. This choice is up to you.
Some of us are prescribed hormones by Gender Identity Clinics and GPs
or private doctors. Some of us buy hormones online or take them without
prescription. However you take them, it’s important to have regular blood
tests to check your liver is working well25.
If you take T but haven’t or don’t want a hysterectomy, your periods are
likely to stop. This makes pregnancy very unlikely, but not impossible.
Without medical testing, we never know what our chances of pregnancy
might be. Unless you are planning for a baby, it is not a good idea to think of
your hormones as contraception.

Injecting: hormones or drugs
Some trans guys self-inject with hormones. Some of us inject drugs like
crystal meth, mephedrone or heroin. If you do inject, be sure not to share
needles or equipment with anyone.
Sharing injecting equipment (syringes, spoons, needles, water) can increase
the risk for hep C and HIV. If you are snorting drugs, sharing straws or rolled
up banknotes is also a risk for hep B and hep C.

CRUISING: A TRANS GUY’S GUIDE TO THE GAY SEX SCENE

 

It is not possible for one page to cover EVERYTHING about hooking up
and fucking for gay, bi and queer trans guys.
There are so many awesome ways to be transmasculine and so many
varying body types in our communities.
However, we hope that knowing the basics about sex, communication and
HIV will help you to have a healthy and hot sex life.